The college football regular season is in the books, and that means we can begin to take stock of yet another intriguing year. When it comes to quotes, there was no shortage of wacky, colorful, passionate comments during the Big Ten season. We've compiled some of our favorites below:
Michigan coach Jim Harbaugh, when told people in Columbus can't decide if he's crazy like a fox or just plain crazy: "Not crazy."
Harbaugh, on the officiating during the Ohio State game: "If you throw a hat, if you throw your script toward your sideline, that's a penalty? The lineman said, 'It is in basketball.' I said, 'This isn't basketball.' He told me that he officiates basketball. I don't know the relevance. He said it would have been a technical in basketball."
Harbaugh, on his team's health in late October: "We had some sickly youngsters last week. We've got to build some immune systems -- more push-ups, more whole milk."
Harbaugh, on his new glasses: "This style in particular is a tip of the cap, a nod to Woody Hayes, to Michael Douglas in the movie 'Falling Down' and also to Malcolm X, in honor of those three men."
Harbaugh, on joining a high school chain gang during Michigan's bye week: "They needed a guy, and I was promised a tri-tip steak sandwich at halftime. That was all I needed to hear."
Michigan State coach Mark Dantonio in mid-October during his team's descent: "You guys are almost apologetic asking me these questions. I still have a sense of humor, believe it or not."
Ohio State coach Urban Meyer, after the Michigan game (cell phone rings): "That's my wife. I'll get right back to you. I'm at the press conference. All right. Bye. She said to bring a gallon of milk home on the way home."
Meyer, after getting hit in the head on the sideline by a referee: "So I text -- I don't know if I’m allowed to say this, and if not I don't care -- it should not have been a penalty, per [Big Ten coordinator of officials] Bill Carollo. He barely grazed my headset. Even [wife] Shelley [Meyer] said, 'Did you get hit in the face?' I said, 'What are you talking about?' Oh, that."
Meyer, on recruiting Sam Hubbard: "I watched him play dodgeball. ... Pretty good dodgeball player. I said, 'Let's get him to camp.'"
Rutgers coach Chris Ash, after his team's 39-0 loss to Penn State: "You look at the stats, we're not even one-dimensional."
Northwestern coach Pat Fitzgerald, on whether he was scratching his head after the team's early-season struggles: "We just stunk. Scratching my head would be a very polite, conservative way to say how I felt."
Iowa punter Ron Coluzzi, on his flop that led to a targeting call on Michigan linebacker Devin Bush: "I thought it was going to get blocked, and then I showed some really poor athleticism. Are you kidding me? A somersault? But that's football."
Coluzzi: "On that play, I thought I was on fire so I stop, drop and rolled to put out the invisible fire."
Michigan's 375-pound freshman lineman Michael Onwenu, when asked what he typically eats during the season to maintain his weight: "I like grapes."
Wisconsin center Michael Deiter, on coach Paul Chryst's sense of humor: "He has a way of getting subtle jokes in, and he's good at. He'll say something and smirk, and I'll be like, 'Oh.' Then 10 minutes later, I'll go 'S---, that's funny.' That happens quite a bit."
Ohio State quarterback J.T. Barrett, on whether the Buckeyes deserved a spot in the College Football Playoff: "I see it like this -- if we win out all our games, Big Ten championship or not, you’re not going to put us in? You’re going to leave Ohio State out? That’s how I see it. It just doesn’t make sense to me."
Purdue coach Darrell Hazell, during his Big Ten media days opening statement: "I used to drive up I-65 northbound side, used to be a billboard that sat on the side of the road, and the first year I saw it, I said, 'It's OK.' The second and third year, I said, 'You know what, it's starting to bother me a little bit.' And the sign said, 'The train is coming.' And in the back of my mind, I said, 'At some point in time, the train has to get here. It has to arrive.' That sign's no longer there."
Penn State coach James Franklin, on the locker room after the Minnesota game: "You guys ever see 'Soul Plane?' It's like that in there."
Wisconsin cornerback Sojourn Shelton, after media questioned whether he got beat in coverage on the game-winning overtime pass breakup against Nebraska: “We were in 2-man. … If anybody doesn’t know what 2-man is, Google does explain what 2-man coverage is."
Michigan wide receiver Eddie McDoom, on where his last name comes from: "I don't know. It's just an awesome name. I got lucky." (Reporter: Jake has a pretty cool name, too, though). "Oh, Jake Butt is a sweet name. It's weird, like, 'Yo, my name is Butt.'"
Illinois coach Lovie Smith, responding to a question about whether he was being too relaxed with his team after it fell to 1-4: "Ask me that question again. Are you freakin' kidding me? Ask me one more time. You think I've been too lax with our football team? I'm freakin' going out there every day, just letting them do what they want to do? Absolutely not. I'm not going to give that question an answer. Lax with the football team? Are you freakin' lax with your job? I'm not either. Thank you."
Penn State tight end Mike Gesicki, after the team's early-season loss to Pitt: "We have more heart, in my three years, than we've ever had. We've got a bunch of dudes that aren't going to give up, that aren't going to quit, and we're going to do whatever it takes to come back and win because we owe it to each other. We owe it to our fans. But, more importantly, we put way too much time into it to just go down 28-7 and say, 'All right, we'll see you guys next week.' No, that's not happening anymore. That's not Penn State. That's not who we are."
Indiana athletics director Fred Glass, after head coach Kevin Wilson's resignation: “I understand that the philosophical differences may be an unsatisfying meal full of empty calories."
Penn State linebacker Brandon Bell, after his team clinched the Big Ten East: “The last four or five years, everyone's talked about what Penn State was and, finally, we’re talking about what Penn State is now.”